Views from a third floor window

Here are some of the highlights of my year. 
JANUARY 
21 - Judy's bday
26 - Burial of one of my favorite lolas
27 - My bday

FEBRUARY
5 - Judy became my girlfriend

APRIL
1 - Graduation day
21 - The last time that I saw Judy who will be leaving for the board exam review at the end of the month

JULY
20  - arrived in manila to live another chapter in my life. Actually, this is where my life started in the first place.

AUGUST
15 - got accepted in EPH and become a ghostwriter. I met new friends which I hope would last for a lifetime and not for a season only like some.

DEC
25 - spent another unique christmas. Another story to tell to anyone in the future.

3 days more and the year will officially end. A year that has involved many significant things that are quite important in my life. Still, it may not sound like a normal year that anyone would dream of having especially if they are in my situation. Many things have happened which have really contributed to the way that I am right now and some of them are things that I wished have never happened at all. Well, there's nothing I can do about it now except to accept and learn in from it. I believed that all of it happened for a reason and it will have significant effects not only during the time that they happened, but also today and in the years to come.
I'm still quite confused about many things and I'm finding it hard to process many of the signs that have been given to me. Part of the problem may lie in the fact that I'm afraid to face some of it. Damn, if only life is not this difficult. I would trade many things just to live the life that I want. One, without hassles but full of excitement and energy. However, that is something that will never happen especially because of the want that everything comes at a price. I came across this theory after experiencing its first hand effects for many instances now. This is why I realized the possible reason on why I am not achieving or receiving everything that I want to achieve. I think that I'm not giving everything that I can give. I'm still afraid of getting hurt, of losing, of being rejected that I try to stay in my comfort zones for as much as possible. Haaaaaayyyyy... Everything that I have said to myself was really just a lie after all and I don't it all just to avoid experiencing everythng all over again.
I think I'm getting really good at that. Running away and escaping from all my responsibilities like that. It's been that ever since. I don't want to be hurt anymore. That's for certain. And I want to be really happy. but I guess one never comes with the other. Still, i'm much thankful that I've learned how to be happy even for the little and insignificant things that appears in my life.
Now, my wish for the new year is to be stronger and better. I'm not making any resolutions and I intended to do that. I don't want to be dependent on other people any more just to be contented and happy. I think that it's time that I must make the rules in my very own life. I really want and need to this very thing. I WANT TO BE STRONGER AND BETTER!!!.

 I had a dream last night. I was in a big house with my family and friends. Suddenly a big flood came and we found our house slowly sinking into the rising waters. We don't have any means of escape and the waters are rising faster by the minute. When the flood is about to drown us all, it was then that I woke up.
The weird thing is that I know that I was the one who caused the flood unintentionally. It's much like the butterfly effect. I can't remember what I did to cause it but I certainly know that I did it.
It's really bugging me out.

Yesterday was a little different from the usual routine that i'm already accustomed into. For the first time in what seem like months, I went out on a gimik with friends. We strolled around, drank, did videoke and ate. Overall, ot was all quite fun except for some annoying instances that is better left forgotten. However, the good thing is that I was able to meet some of the people that I know only by usernames and avatars and I'm really glad that I did.

Good points of the trip:
1. I was able to go out and breath some fresh sea air
2. I was able to meet new people and friends
3. I was able to stay out late
4. We are able to do more things as compared to the last eb.
5. We were able to sing in a videoke room
6. We were able to stroll or walked around MOA

Bad points of the trip:
1. At around 2, we had lunch at Kenny Roger's roasters and I ate one of the most terrible - tasting spaghetti and chicken strips in my life. It's a good thing that I was quite hungry so I was able to finish everything that I ordered.
2. We went to this seafood restaurant, Aling Tonya's something at around 4:00 pm, hoping to enjoy some videoke moments while drinking and knowing each other but the their machine became unavailable the moment we ordered some food and drinks. They said that they have called their technician but we wait for a good 3 hours to no avail. The good thing about that is some of us were able to be creative and provided life to the party. Nice work Dann!
3. We ate at Bacolod's chicken inasal at around 10 and I we experienced one of the most terrible kind of restaurant services in our lives. It was unlikely that the service is so busy since its basically not a fastfood restaurant but who would ever want to eat in an installment type of way? Nakakawalang gana! Our food has really lost their taste because of the fact that we waited for a long time for all our orders to be served out. One of their waiters are quoted as saying, "manager pa naman." He is actually referring to the fact that the manager was the one who took our orders but then either completely forgotten about us or deliberately ignored us.

Still, the overall trip is quite good and I'm really looking forward to the next one! Thanks guys!

It's a friday night and I'm here at home spending my time watching the lights from beyond my window turn off and on. It has been a very tiring day for me and I's so glad that it will finally be over soon. I would very much like to spend the night outside with a couple of friends but the fact that I don't have any money to spend is a very, very big factor. Actually I have some amount left but I'm saving it for a scheduled eb or eyeball tomorrow. I'm meeting with some new - found friends in the SM mall of asia which if you think about it is so very far from my place. However, distance has never been a problem for me especially when it comes to meeting friends. It is as long as I have the financial capability to go. Otherwise, then it'll be a "see you next time Pra", and I would again waste my time thinking about the many things that they have done while I'm not there. I value friendship a lot and I will try to do all that I can for anyone who proves to be a good friend. All the people that have come into my life has always been a source of joy and sorrow especially those who have left their mark and has never left.
These are the people that I've meet in many places that I've set my foot into. Some of these are persons which are better left forgotten but some are people whom I would be willing to meet again no matter how many times it may be. Ah, if only time and fate permits I would live my past life all over again with these people. 

1.Grace Park, Caloocan City - my childhood friends(kris, shirley, mak, manny, jonathan...); my classmates and teachers at Notre Dame of Greater Manila where I spent Kinder up to Grade 5
2.Pandan, Antique - may hs batchmates, parokya ni paday, my teachers, my mentors, my cousins and others who have been part of the greatest turning point of my life.
3. Zamboanga City - my landlady who has been like a mother to me during these times when i'm struggling all alone in the dark
4.Jolo, Sulu - this is where the butterfly emerged from the pupa where he was kept in the dark for so long(Ate bing, Maam Midang and others who have helped guide me back to the path that I must walk upon in my life. This is also where I first experienced the tragic effects of love. 
5. Kalibo, Aklan - my BSA classmates, my teachers, my cowriters in the school publication and my very first gf(hope she's always ok wherever she may be right now)

This has served as a recap not only of the people I want to meet again but also of the many chapters that happened to my life. haayy... Drama?... I think I need a beer.

This is my first blog post since God knows when. I've been wanting to start a blog for some time now but was unable to do so due to some reasons. That is, until now. This has made this post a very memorable moment for me. I will be using ths account to mirror my everyday life from now on. It will reflect all my experiences, thoughts, feelings and ideas. Hopefully this will prove to be a very good outlet for me and i will be able to express everything that i'm hiding inside for a very long time now.

This been an uneventful day for me for i spent most of it in bed. This is due mainly to a slight hangover that i incurred after drinking gsm blue last night with my cousin. I knew that my tolerance for hard drinks has been decreasing as of late but it  is not a reason for me to stop myself from drinking. Actually, it was just a random idea that my cousin suggested after he went home last night with a new and terrible haircut. Its not that terrible actually but it made him look like a 1st year high schooler. hahaha... In my case, I just felt like drinking during that time so I agreed. And the rest is history.

This is not typical of me to get a hangover since I'm the type of person who doesn't drink to get drunk. I drink because i love drinking. I'm not an alcoholic or someone who is dependent on alcoholic drinks but I consider drinking as one of the things that makes life a little more risky and enjoyable.

I started drinking when I was in 1st year high school and I was baptized with a mixture of Tanduay rhum and Red horse beer. Since then, I have tasted so many different kinds of drinks from gin and brandy to whisky and vodka. In the past, I have been fond of mixing many kinds of drinks and I even dreamed of becoming a bartender. But certain circumstance in my life has limitted me to mixing drinks only at home. One of my favorites during that time is the Boracay mix which is a mixture of Tanduay rhum, condensed milk and softdrinks. This has proven to be a hit to my friends especially with its sweet taste and modest after effects. It hits them the moment they try to stand up. whapaak! It makes for a nice but affordable party drink.

Now, i'm more at home with a light beer. It enables me to drink much without getting drunk so easily. It gives a good feeling especially when chatting with friends and looking at strangers.

This is all for now. Cheers!